Category: Lize
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Thought Vomit #110: ft. Homeopathic Tendencies
I’ve been diagnosed as a homeopath. It’s a diluted form of sociopathy or psychopathy apparently, and I display some classic homeopathic tendencies. I show a certain amount of detachment from reality, I make palpably false statements, I take a lot but give back very little, I chronically fail to take responsibility for harming others, and…
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Thought Vomit #108: ft. Stomach It
I’ve been suffering terribly this week with stomach inflammation, and as always my doctor hasn’t been much use. He tried to blame it on the amount of food I’ve been eating, but that can’t be right. I mean, eating a cake the size of Ron Howard is par for the course in my house. So…
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Thought Vomit #101: ft. Sums
Our world is ruled by numbers. The FTSE screams its figures at us like it’s got mathematical Tourettes, and interest rates can literally make people defecate. Numbers is money, and money are numbers. It’s as if the entire planet were built on them. So is it any wonder that those very same numbers can demonstrate…
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Thought Vomit #97: ft. A Broken Pencil
I took a personality test this afternoon. Apparently I’m gregarious, fashionable, out-going, over-confident, attractive and honest. Now, those of you that know me will recognise all of those qualities, but according to the results of the test, they are negative traits. Luckily, the man who tested me had an idea as to how I could…
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Thought Vomit #91: ft. My New Diet
In my continued to quest to lose weight, I decided it was time to head to a spiritual nutritionist. Not one of these wacko plop-obsessives like McKeith, or anyone with a fancy schmancy so-called science degree, but a good old fashioned expert borne from the school of life. A string of advisors have tried to…