Category: Lize

  • Thought Vomit #110: ft. Homeopathic Tendencies

    I’ve been diagnosed as a homeopath. It’s a diluted form of sociopathy or psychopathy apparently, and I display some classic homeopathic tendencies. I show a certain amount of detachment from reality, I make palpably false statements, I take a lot but give back very little, I chronically fail to take responsibility for harming others, and…

  • Thought Vomit #108: ft. Stomach It

    I’ve been suffering terribly this week with stomach inflammation, and as always my doctor hasn’t been much use. He tried to blame it on the amount of food I’ve been eating, but that can’t be right. I mean, eating a cake the size of Ron Howard is par for the course in my house. So…

  • Thought Vomit #101: ft. Sums

    Our world is ruled by numbers. The FTSE screams its figures at us like it’s got mathematical Tourettes, and interest rates can literally make people defecate. Numbers is money, and money are numbers. It’s as if the entire planet were built on them. So is it any wonder that those very same numbers can demonstrate…

  • Thought Vomit #97: ft. A Broken Pencil

    I took a personality test this afternoon. Apparently I’m gregarious, fashionable, out-going, over-confident, attractive and honest. Now, those of you that know me will recognise all of those qualities, but according to the results of the test, they are negative traits. Luckily, the man who tested me had an idea as to how I could…

  • Thought Vomit #91: ft. My New Diet

    In my continued to quest to lose weight, I decided it was time to head to a spiritual nutritionist. Not one of these wacko plop-obsessives like McKeith, or anyone with a fancy schmancy so-called science degree, but a good old fashioned expert borne from the school of life. A string of advisors have tried to…

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  • Nineteen 90s Shows
    Nineteen 90s Shows

    I wrote another book about television. I like television. I like television so much that the first thing I modelled and printed on my new 3d printer was this … I made some more after that too. There’s a few more, including TVS, ATV, and HTV, but I bought you here to talk about my…

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  • Re-Casting Keanu
    Re-Casting Keanu

    Keanu Reeves is 56. That makes him eight years older than Clive Dunn was when he was first cast in Dad’s Army. But don’t panic, Clive Dunn was always playing much older characters than his own age. Keanu Reeves is 56. That makes him seven years older than Stephanie Cole was when she was first…

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